Written on April 28, 2008 by Tom Stine
I finished my second 5 day retreat with Adyashanti last Friday, and I’d like to share with you my experience once again. I will follow the same basic format as the last report, so have fun doing a comparison between the two.
Purpose of the Retreat
As I mentioned in my last retreat report, the purpose of the retreat was to deepen one’s experience of Truth, to experience a true opening or moment of pure awareness, and to possibly experience an abiding awakening. Adyashanti is a big proponent of “awakening in this lifetime, if not now.”
Adyashanti
A middle class guy, he used to work as a machinist before he started the spiritual teacher gig. Serious student of Zen for 15 years. A talented speaker and teacher. A guy who likes playing poker. All these are descriptions of Adyashanti. And while I could list 20 more, none of them would even come close to explaining to you what he is like.
I was born a skeptic. I used to be quite judgmental, especially of what I would have called 20 years ago “that religious crap.” My mom taught me from a young age how to find fault in anything (God bless you, Mom!). While it is true that I have changed over the years, quite radically to be sure, I would like to think I’m probably somewhat immune to the whole guru-disciple relationship, or at least extremely uninterested in it. I’m still a touch skeptical.
And guess what? Adya has setup his teaching and organization to make something like that almost impossible. No ashram, no worshipping the guru, none of that. A very welcome change in the spiritual world. A model for others to emulate in my opinion.
This retreat was Adya’s first since returning to teaching after a 3 month absence due to illness. He was in rare form. He was funny, energized, extremely approachable during satsang, vibrant, alive. He was all of these things last December, to be sure, but this retreat everything was double. His time away served him well. He had 350 people laughing, deeply moved, and experiencing Presence.
Silence
The silence at this retreat was SILENCE. It was huge, palpable, intense at times. Alive and vibrant. I entered the retreat in a very different place than the last one, so this time I had a much deeper and richer experience of the true nature of Silence.
Indeed, it was a silent retreat in the conventional sense, which meant no communication of any sort from Sunday evening until Friday at 11:00 am. I love the silence. Very, very good for one’s soul (well, that is if one actually had a soul).
People
How could the people be any more wonderful? There were older women with long gray hair and “earthy” clothing. Young guys with shaved heads. Beautiful women to give the mind something to fixate upon. Ugly old guys with big bellies eating 2 or 3 desserts at dinner. There was no one type or even close.
The silence at this retreat was SILENCE. It was huge, palpable, intense at times. Alive and vibrant.
And then there was the star of the last evening’s satsang, the 12 Step Lady. She wasn’t trying to be funny, but her story, her demeanor, her comments, you name it, had everyone laughing uproariously. She could do stand-up. I can’t wait to get the recording of the retreat just to hear her again.
Finally, as there were a number of us from out of state, we got the experience of sharing a 10 passenger van for a 2 hour trip from San Jose International Airport to Monterey. What a great group who rode down and back together. We met for dinner after the retreat at a lovely Indian restaurant in San Jose. We came from Milwaukee, West Palm Beach, Charlottesville, VA, Barrington, RI, Chicago and of course Ozark, MO (yours truly). Blessings to all of you.
Schedule
Same as before. Meditate for 40 minutes at 7:30 a.m., breakfast, satsang with Adya from 10 a.m.-12 p.m., lunch, 3 meditations of 40 minutes each with 30 minute breaks in the afternoon, rest period, dinner, satsang with Adya from 7-8:45 p.m., final meditation, lights out at 10:00 p.m. We had 5 meditations for a total of over 3 hours of sitting each day. I often skipped 2 of the afternoon meditations because my back was killing me sitting in the meditation hall. I would go sit in one of the many funky old buildings, in a comfy chair in front of the fireplace and meditate or take a walk on the beach. Those times were amazing, lots of great moments sitting in silence watching the processes of my mind.
How I Spent My Days
I got up, meditated, ate, walked on the beach, sat, listened to Adya, slept at night. I did nothing else. No computer, no phone, no conversation. Just hours and hours of meditating and contemplating and sitting.
This retreat was a bit unique because I shared a room with a good friend of mine. And we spent 5 days actively ignoring each other! I tried my best to not look at him because the temptation to slap him on the back or crack a joke was high at times. He reported after the retreat that he had to consciously ignore me, too. It was great to talk with him afterwards, though, and compare experiences. He loved the retreat, too.
Location
Asilomar, you get better each time! The former YWCA camp turned conference center is right on the beach, and this time I couldn’t spend enough time walking down to Pebble Beach and listening to the sound of the surf. Between the beach, the incredible staff who skillfully accommodated 350 silent people, the good food and the funky old buildings, well, it is a perfect location for a retreat.
My Experience This Time Around
I will confess that I went to the retreat with a bit of a theme. I’ve learned over time that expectations can often be less than helpful, but fortunately for me, they did not get in the way. In a certain sense, I really didn’t have an expectation. More of a push in a certain direction. No matter; my bit of theme for the retreat was to deepen my experience of oneness. And, interestingly, I did.
From the moment I got on the shuttle from the airport I started experiencing reinforcement of a framework that I’ve found useful for looking at awakening. I first learned of this framework from Adyashanti, in fact, but I’ve run across it in other places. It is best seen in the following statement from Nisargadatta Maharaj:
When I look within and see that I am nothing,
that is wisdom.
When I look without and see that I am everything,
that is love.
And between these two, my life turns.
I will write an article at some point concerning my experiences with awakening, but suffice it to say that in this framework, I’ve looked within and seen that I am nothing. And so I wanted to go beyond what had been my limited tastes of oneness, of everything-ness. Well, I really shouldn’t say “I wanted to go beyond” but, well, you get the idea. There was something pulling me in that direction.
So, when I got on the shuttle, a woman I met had returned recently from India where she had spent 3 weeks at Oneness University. A long discussion ensued, naturally. When I mentioned a bit about my interest in oneness, she recommended a book to me by Arjuna Ardagh entitled Awakening to Oneness (you know I will buy it and read it, right?). And on and on it goes, oneness, oneness, oneness just flowing out of people’s mouths, Adya’s guided meditations, you name it.
When I look within and see that I am nothing, that is wisdom.
When I look without and see that I am everything, that is love.
And between these two, my life turns.
I dialogued with Adya on the first full day about some recent experiences I have had, and also on this theme of oneness, and he told me what I knew to be the case already: just let it happen. Story of my life (and yours, too, if you must know the truth). Just let it happen. It is inevitable. It is the way of all things. And so, something within me relaxed, and I started having the most sublime experiences of unity with people, things, feelings, locations, you name it. I simply let go, relaxed, and went with the fact that there is no difference between me and anything else other than what my thoughts say. And they are not true. Ever.
I’ve had various discussions about thoughts with others on the path, and my experience at this retreat reinforced a viewpoint (or more appropriately, a knowingness) I have been taking more and more. And that is that all thoughts are untrue. Even the ones that have a semblance of truth, such as 2+2=4, are still not true. Oh, sure, 2+2=4 is useful, but even a “law” of nature could change tomorrow.
Everything in the world of form changes, or at the very least can change. If you ask me, “Will 2 plus 2 equal 4 tomorrow?” in all honesty I have to answer “I don’t know.” How can I know? The future is always The Unknown. As I begin to see things more clearly, it appears to me that there is only one Truth not many, and this one Truth is beyond all words (although it is a lot of fun to attempt to discuss it with words). All else is supposition, believe, mind stuff. And thoroughly untrue. Even this viewpoint (see, lots of fun!).
Bowing
Of course, I could go on and on with my experiences, but I will leave you with one curious thing that happened that has been a joyous relief to me. I live in a part of the US that is not the hippest place to be. We are a middle class, Midwestern place with strong Christian values. Folks like me are not that common. We also lack a strong professional class, and since Missouri State University is here, we have tons of middle class college kids running around. I hope I’m painting a fair and accurate picture. You probably can envision the place, right?
Given all the above, and given that I work at home, it is not that easy to meet “like minded people” where I live. In California, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel, but here, it is more like trying to catch a fish in a toxic lake. That has frustrated me over the years. I have lots of friends whom I love dearly, but I have longed to meet “my people.”
Well, guess what? Everyone is my people. And I learned this fact from a very simple action: bowing. Adyashanti spent 15 years studying Zen before he experienced his final awakening, so he flavors his retreats with a bit of Zen. And one of those flavorings is bowing. At the beginning of each meditation, we are encouraged to bow to our chairs, partly as a way to break the attachment to the “guru” up front by humbling oneself before an inanimate object that is just as “holy” as the holy man up front. Also, bowing to our chair is paying respect to our seat, the place where we will be supported (literally) in our meditations. In addition, we bowed twice at the end of every meditation.
I really got into the bowing on this retreat, and the thought came to me to bow to people whenever I was experiencing any sort of dissonance in their presence. It is amazing the feelings and thoughts that get generated even when people say absolutely nothing to you. Their gestures, their clothes, their jewelry, their hair(!) you name it, all can provoke reactions. But when I bowed, all reaction evaporated. I simply fell silent from the humble action of bowing in humility to what outwardly appears to be another person, but who in truth is the same as what I am.
Inwardly I started to experience a sense of “and them, too” as I bowed. They rarely if ever noticed my little bow, but I did. The sense of oneness grew deeper and deeper from doing so. And now that I’m at home, I’m still bowing. Bowing to the cashier at the grocery store, the farmer driving his truck way too slowly, my son, my ex, everyone I meet. What a blessing! People are so amazingly beautiful when you bow to them.
So you can see that this retreat was Tom’s Oneness Retreat. How nice, wouldn’t you say? That was the essence of everything that occurred for and to me. And I keep on bowing.
The $64,000 Question Yet Again: Did Tom awaken?
I asked this question at the end of the the last retreat report because several people at that retreat had said that they “came to the retreat hoping to awaken.” I gave a nice little answer to the question in the previous report, which was a good one for me at that time. But now, I have a different one:
What a silly question!
A better answer than that will be forthcoming. I need a few more days to sit and reflect and, well, be silent some more. But now I am seeing the question as completely irrelevant and, in point of fact, misguided. That would explain why those who go to retreats such as these hoping to awaken are most often disappointed.
But fortunately for me, I was not disappointed. I’m glad I went. Exceptionally glad. Your thoughts and comments are most welcome.
Written on April 26, 2008 by Tom Stine
Welcome home! I came back to Missouri to the warm embrace of my amazing son. It was a pleasure to be around him for a few hours (he’s at his mom’s house until Monday). I felt a tenderness for him that, while I have felt before, feels deeper and richer now. More expansive and loving. I have always adored my kid, but now, so much sweeter.
I will be slowly coming “down off the mountaintop” of my retreat with Adyashanti over the next few days. I tried last night, after the end of the retreat, to write a few words and respond to some comments here, but I had a difficult time. The Silence this time was very intense, and while I’ve been talking easily with people, I almost need the give and take of dialog to keep me going. When I stare at a blank screen, well, I don’t really mind that it is blank!
In a few days I will post a report on the retreat. Adya was not only healthy for this retreat, but he was in rare form. He was funnier, more engaging, more alive and vibrant than the last retreat, and I’ve never heard a crowd laugh as much on any recording I’ve heard of his (and I have over 150 hours of his recorded talks). When the recordings of this retreat go on sale late in the summer, I strongly suggest you buy a copy. You will love it.
Glad to be home, though. As Adya is fond of saying, the real retreat begins when the retreat ends. It’s called “my life.”
Written on April 24, 2008 by Tom Stine
I dig spiritual awakening. Do you? Honestly, I know of no other topic that lights me up and gets my attention. Therefore, I’d like to share some cool blogs that are very awakening focused. I’ve discovered these great sites and people over the past few months, and they put out some great stuff.
Takuin Minamoto writes passionately from his experience. His posts are moving and almost a meditation in and of themselves.
Davidya has a lot of great commentary on the subject of awakening. I found him recently because of a post he did on Adyashanti. He has been leaving some fantastic comments on my post Adyashanti Retreat Report, where he, J Stone and I have been having quite the exchange of ideas and thoughts.
Kenton Whitman writes a Zen inspired blog that has a number of excellent posts that deal with the whole topic of awakening.
There are other sites to check-out, too, on this subject, my favorite being Adyashanti’s web site. You can watch videos and download free audio recordings of Adya speaking about awakening.
And last, but not least, I’d like to give a big thumbs up to two spirituality blogs that I really like. While his blog isn’t about awakening, my friend Albert at UrbanMonk.net writes a spiritually inspired blog on personal development. Albert has been writing some excellent posts lately, and I suggest you check him out.
The second is Divine Purpose Unleashed written by CK and Michelle, two very in tune women who write about how to find your divine purpose. Michelle interviewed me on her Internet radio show last month.
Enjoy these blogs. I do. Talk to you soon when the retreat is over.
Written on April 22, 2008 by Tom Stine
“When you don’t cover up the world with words and labels, a sense of the miraculous returns to you life that was lost a long time ago when humanity, instead of using thought, became possessed by thought. A depth returns to your life. Things regain their newness, their freshness. And the greatest miracle is the experiencing of your essential self as prior to any words, thoughts, mental labels and images. For this to happen, you need to disentangle your sense of I, of Beingness, from all the things it has become mixed up with, that is to say, identified with.”
Eckhart Tolle does a marvelous job of expressing the essence of the spiritual journey in this one little paragraph. A vast array of ideas, activities, thoughts, practices, you name it, are bundled into the concept of spirituality. But really, ultimately, spirituality is simply about what you are. It doesn’t get any simpler than that. Eckhart calls this disentangling your sense of I, in other words, discovering what you really are, discovering your beingness.
A New Earth is a truly inspirational book, and the work that Eckhart Tolle and Oprah are doing together is powerful and transformative. I feel a book review coming on! And a final review of the webinars from Eckhart and Oprah.
Written on April 18, 2008 by Tom Stine
Last week, I wrote an article listing 6 “mistakes” I had made on the spiritual journey. Being of reasonable intelligence (no comments, please!), it dawned on me that maybe I could do a follow-up article on what I’ve learned from spirituality. Admittedly, I learned from all my seeming mistakes, but this article will look at my learnings from a slightly more positive angle.
Warning: I’m going to take some shots at some deeply held spiritual ideas and beliefs. I can’t possibly explain some of what I’ve learned without them. Some of what you find under the heading of spirituality just doesn’t make much sense to me, or simply doesn’t seem to work. So, you’ve been warned. 
That said, in no particular order, here are 11 things that I’ve learned:
- The entire spiritual journey is a journey to discover what you are. Who knew? Just because the enlightened ones for thousands of years have been telling us this one doesn’t mean I should have been listening, right? Over and over again I’ve head the message, but until the past few years I failed to pay any attention. “Find out first what you are.” That’s it. All the rest is a side dish.
- I am not who I thought I was. For 43 years, I thought I was Tom Stine. Well, make that 41 years, because for the first 2 years I didn’t really think I was anyone. Around the age of 2 or so we start to believe we are Tom or Tina or Bob or Alice. But a funny thing happens when you actually start to do spiritual inquiry. You ask the question, “What am I?” You look within. And you inevitably arrive at some variation on “I don’t know.” Haven’t you been, in one form or another, haunted by that realization your whole life? Wasn’t that part of the utter agony of being a teenager, not knowing the answer to “What am I?” As I started to work with “What am I?” I found myself confronted by the obvious fact that when I look within I found nothing. And after a while, I started to accept that maybe this nothing I kept finding was in some way what I am. And then I experienced a great discovery: nothing isn’t just nothing. As one master said, “It’s the fullest nothing you’ll ever bump against.” And there it is: I’m not Tom, really. I’m much more than that. And you are much more than your persona, too.
The entire spiritual journey is a journey to discover what you are. Who knew?
- The Truth is outside of the mind and cannot be found in the mind. That was a tough one to learn, but in the end, everyone has to learn it. You can never find out the truth by searching for it in your mind. The mind is contained in the truth. And the truth, the great spiritual truth that everyone is seeking, is that you are the everything, consciousness, Presence, the Void, God.
- Thoughts might be useful at times, but most are not to be believed. Unfortunately, the vast majority of what I believe is not only false in terms of ultimate truth, but isn’t even true in a relative sense. I had to be honest: how many thousands of times had I believed a thought that passes through my head only to discover I was incredibly wrong? Pretty much every thought you have about why someone did or said something to you has been a complete disaster. “Mary yelled at me because she isn’t a nice person,” goes the thought, which ignores the 100 times Mary has been kind and generous. Sound familiar? Come on, be honest, your thinking is a disaster! 2+2=4? Useful at times. The rest? Garbage! The great cosmic joke. The less I believe my thoughts, the happier I am and the better life is.
- Spiritual ideas and thoughts are useful but not the truth. This follows from the point above. We can discuss and debate spirituality until the cows come home but doing so won’t produce any truth. We have to experience the living splendor of the ideas and words. Until they come alive within you, they are symbols of symbols of Reality. When I got out of my head and down into my heart and gut, when the words started coming alive within me from hours of sitting and opening and letting go of my beliefs, then spirituality started to live and breath in me. That’s where it’s at. This relates to the point I was making in my previous article, What Is Spirituality? Really. Check it out.
- Channeling. *sigh* I can’t do channeling any more. I tried valiantly, even going so far as to pretend that A Course in Miracles isn’t really a channeled book. But it is. Why don’t I care for channeling, you ask? Because channeling requires a lot of faith and willingness to believe in it. I don’t want to have to believe in any aspect of spirituality any more. Direct experience or nothing, thank you very much. Look at it this way: channeling requires that you have faith in the truthfulness of the channel. There’s no way to prove or disprove that the channel really is letting a 10,000 year old Lemurian come through them. The only choice, the way I see it, is to accept that the channeling is real, and that’s before you even get to the ideas the channel is stating. Too many evaluations for me. Moreover, some channels seem just a little too unstable for my taste. Apparently the channeled material hasn’t done them a whole lot of good. So, I prefer to take my spirituality straight-up, not through an intermediary. Please don’t misunderstand, none of what I’m saying means that channeled material is all garbage. Far from it. Some of it rings quite true. But I don’t really see it as necessary. If it works for you, fine, but again, I prefer my own direct experience. I don’t want to have to sort out the messenger as well as the message.
- Jesus, I love you, but did you really exist? By the same standards, I can’t accept Jesus or the Buddha as necessarily real, historical people. All we have are a bunch of stories written by their disciples and followers, and most of what is written wasn’t even written by eyewitnesses. Any historian worth his salt would cry foul at this point. Ah, but then there is faith, you say. You have to believe. Well, yes, but again, I like direct experience. I’ve benefited greatly from reading the words attributed to the Buddha and Jesus, but it is only as they have come alive within me that they have any real meaning or reality. This awakening within me has led me to believe that Jesus and the Buddha quite likely were historical figures, but I know it is merely a belief, nothing more. And just because my mind likes it and finds it fascinating doesn’t make it so.
- There’s a lot of wild wacky stuff that is called “spirituality”. I’m sure to step on a few toes with this one, but, c’est la vie! Would you believe at the start of my spiritual journey, 18 years ago, I tried living on sprouts, nuts and dried fruit, in the winter, in hopes of enlightening myself? Yep, sure did. And all I managed to do was “lighten” myself by about 40 pounds! At least I got to eat like a hog when I finally realized that I was being, well, plain stupid. I could go on with plenty of other examples from my life and others, but you get the idea. Given that most spiritual growth occurs from living a fairly normal life with periods of meditation, contemplation or prayer thrown in then, well, eating sprouts or sticking crystals in various body cavities seems a little silly. But hey, it could be kinda fun!
- Past lives have very little to do with right now, and right now is where it is at. I’ve been to a few psychics, some quite good. I’ve been told I was general in Napoleon’s army (I love France and speaking French), a prostitute (I guess because I like sex?) and a priest (no idea why this one). And in the end, knowing these things has been completely useless to me. As a matter of fact, all explanations in this vain have not helped me in the slightest on the spiritual journey. They are fun to play with, sure, but they haven’t contributed to my growth. I like what Adyashanti said in response to a question about past lives: “As near as I can tell, it seems like most people who remember past lives were at the foot of the cross when Jesus was crucified. There must have been few million people milling around.” If you do past lives, great, more power to you. But knowing a past life is really no more useful than knowing any other memory when it comes to the real “goal” of spirituality: awakening to the truth of what we are.
- Spiritual people are wonderful, beautiful, delightful people. I love spiritual people. I love accountants and doctors and lawyers, too (yes, even lawyers!). But I get a thorough kick out of the energy and aliveness that spiritual folks have. And not just Eastern or New Agey spiritual people. I love walking into a cathedral in Paris and feeling the energy that has been poured into it by millions of devoted, fervent prayers over the course of centuries. I love walking into just about any old church, for that matter. Even though some crazy stuff gets said in them, the spirit of the practitioners is wonderful to me. I’ve met some wonderful Baptists, Catholics, Buddhists, you name it.
- Life is too much fun to take anything in spirituality too seriously, including all the above! I used to be so incredibly serious about this whole spirituality thing. I was dedicated, I was intense. Still am a little. But most of that has faded. Everything has gotten too funny to take too seriously. Far more fun to enjoy life. Not like a hedonist, but just enjoy the flow. I still sit a lot because I enjoy a good meditation. But it is lighter these days. And getting lighter and lighter the more I sit.
That should be enough for today. I could write 50 more, and expand on many of the above, though. I think once each month I will try to toss out a little list of things that I’ve learned on the spiritual journey.
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Written on April 16, 2008 by Tom Stine
In my last video post, I answered the question Why I Write About Spirituality. I really enjoyed answering that question, and it got me thinking about the subject more and more. Spirituality is a big topic, so I started asking myself a bunch of what questions, such as “What subjects in spirituality do I enjoy most?” and others. The more I played around with these questions, the more my thinking started shifting and jumping around, doing a little dance about the writing I do and what I am writing about.
For a while, I’ve had a strong notion of what it is that I am writing about, but for some reason I’ve had a hard time putting it into words. I think I can now. I hope from this post you will get a clearer sense of what this site is all about in the same way that I did.
What subjects in spirituality do you enjoy most?
Two subjects really work for me: (1) awakening and (2) practical spirituality. Awakening seems to me the ultimate aim of all spirituality. It is the end, in a sense, of the spiritual journey, even though in another sense it is just a beginning. But completely opening to what we are is the only true goal.
That said, I love what I call practical spirituality because spirituality has proven to be the most reliable and successful means for me to create lasting and positive change in my worldly life. We are, after all, human beings as well as spiritual beings, and the human must be reckoned with. Awakening, to be sure, is the best resolution to all life’s problems. But there is a lot of great stuff in the world of spirituality to help us along. That’s why I love the Sedona Method so much.
And most importantly, for me all of spirituality should be practical. It is so easy to talk, talk, talk about things of the spirit. But what do we do with it all? Just sit in a cafe and chatter with our spiritual friends about all the cool ideas that Eckhart Tolle and Oprah are talking about? I think not. Far better to listen to Eckhart or whomever and then do what they suggest. By being practical about our spirituality, we actually move closer to the ultimate goal: awakening to the truth.
What is your primary purpose for writing and for this website?
Sharing my experiences and teaching others. That’s it in a nutshell. I want this website to become a source of spiritual growth for others. I want my experiences to help you to go where I’ve gone and where I’m going. Because, in the end, we go together, you and I. Yes, again, very practical.
Who is your audience?
I’ve had visitors that are from every “level” of spiritual experience. I guess in one sense I’m writing for truth seekers. And I’m writing for people that want a little inspiration about and insight into the spiritual journey and who are looking for a little help and support along the way. But mainly, I’m writing for that large mass of spiritual folks who desire to get moving, who want to learn and grow and experience all that spirituality has to offer. That’s my audience.
What are your primary spiritual influences? Which teachers have you followed?
Here is a list of who and what has influenced me on the spiritual path, in no particular order:
- Adyashanti Yes, I really like Adya and his teachings. Very helpful.
- The Sedona Method.
- Joel Goldsmith. I loved reading his book The Infinite Way
years ago. Good stuff.
- A Course in Miracles
. I was a serious Course student for 10 years.
- Nisargadatta Maharaj. His book, I Am That
, is one of the best books I have ever read.
- Ramana Maharshi. The book Talks With Ramana Maharshi
is a continuing source of enlightenment.
- Sri Sadhu Om. He was a disciple of Ramana Maharshi, and his books
are a great explanation of Ramana’s teachings.
- Jesus of Nazarath. I have been strongly influenced by his teachings, especially as found in the Gospel of Thomas
. I have benefited, too, from the Jesus scholarship I have read.
- Buddhism. I have been a closet Buddhist of sorts over the years. Someday, I’m going to “study” Buddhism, mainly to gain a greater familiarity with the Buddha’s teachings.
What’s next?
In the coming weeks and months, I plan to spend a lot of time writing for you. I’m going to start writing more articles on different aspects of practical spirituality, such as the recent post I did on Spirituality and Money. I want to write more on other areas such as relationships, offer suggestions for meditation, and give tips on how to move down the spiritual path.
To catch all the latest articles, tips, suggestions and thoughts flowing out of my computer to yours, how about subscribing to TomStine.com.
Written on April 12, 2008 by Tom Stine
Yes, I know, there are no mistakes on the spiritual journey. There can’t be, if you think about it. The spiritual journey is, to a certain extent, a process of learning. And don’t we almost always learn best from what we often see as our mistakes? But then, if we learn from them, if we grow from them, how could they really be mistakes?
As you venture down the spiritual path, you really start seeing your life as a long curriculum in a giant classroom called Life. No mistakes. Just your individual assignments. I have had my “lessons” to learn, my conditioning to undo.
That said, here are 6 things that I would have previously called mistakes. For me, they weren’t. But maybe you will see something in them that will help you as you journey down the path.
- You cannot choose love too often. So many times along the path, I’ve been given the opportunity to choose love or fear. Many, many times I chose fear. I pushed people and things away to avoid loving them. I suffered, to be sure, and Life graciously came back and offered the lesson again and again. I’m very glad it did. Choose love.
- You can’t sit too much. I loved meditating when I first started, but I loved reading about and talking about spirituality more. And reading and talking about spirituality, while they can be helpful, just doesn’t cut the mustard. Spirituality must be lived, it must be experienced. Sitting with yourself, finding out what you really are is so incredibly important and transformative.
- Not enough time spent in nature. For centuries, spiritual masters have made references to nature, to time spent in nature, as a part of their journey. There is something about the trees, the rocks, the plants, the sky, the sun that calls to us. Being in nature is a powerful aid to our spiritual growth. Taking a walk in the pines will do more for you than a library full of books.
- Being arrogant about my beliefs. I was a jerk in the early days of my journey. I was cocky, overly confident, and thought I knew it all. What a joke! The real truth of the matter is that I knew so little. By being so cocky, I rejected a lot of interesting and potentially helpful spiritual teachings along the way. I had to learn humility, almost by force. I’m truly grateful I did, because now I see so clearly how all the things I thought I knew were an obstacle of sorts to knowing the only thing that mattered: who I truly am.
- Believing that feelings are reliable guides to behavior and truth. I’ve made lots of choices in life based upon how I feel, which is not a great idea, I’ve come to see. Feelings are just feelings. They are simply sensations in our bodies in response to our thoughts. They have something to teach us, for certain, but they aren’t the truth. For instance, every time you’ve experienced anxiety, you are afraid of something that is only in your mind. But you aren’t in eminent danger, and you aren’t going to die. Thus, anxiety is a poor guide for action. The only thing to do with feelings is to experience them and then let them go. Feelings want to be felt. Let the energy flow. As Hale Dwoskin of the Sedona Method likes to say: “Feelings are not true, they are not you, and you can let them go.”
- Rejecting spiritual teachings before giving them a chance. This goes along with number 4 above. For instance, I hated The Secret when I first saw it. I was very agitated after watching it because I had a strong reaction to some of the “personalities” in it. They seemed so arrogant and, well, like used car salesmen. And so I rejected all the ideas in The Secret. Of course, I was being as arrogant as they seemed to be. There are good ideas in The Secret, and had I listened to some of them, I might have found a way to learn some lessons that I took over a year to learn the hard way.
I’ve found over the years that one of the best ways to learn and grow is from hearing other people’s stories, their successes and mistakes along the spiritual path. I would love to hear of your “mistakes” in the comments.
One mistake I won’t make: I won’t forget to ask you to subscribe to TomStine.com.
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