Written on November 23, 2009 by Tom Stine
Intelligent practice always deals with just one thing: the fear at the base of human existence, the fear that I am not. And of course I am not, but the last thing I want to know is that.
Written on October 19, 2008 by Tom Stine
To continue my recent theme about control, let’s take a look at the real heart of the issue. In previous posts, I discussed how the idea of being in control is pretty much illusory and how you can’t even control what your next thought is going to be. In this little essay, I want to look at the controller, the you that has no control over anything.
From the beginning, the idea of control over one’s life, one’s thoughts, one’s actions, anything and everything, presupposes that there is a someone who is in control. That stands to reason, doesn’t it? If there is control, there must be a controller.
So, find him or her. Right now, see if you can find the controller, the one who has control over this thing called “your life.” Is it your body? Does it have control over your life? Is it your mind? Does it have control over your life? Do its wishes, desires, thoughts and even intentions have control? Given that thoughts have a crazy way of “just arising spontaneously” then the mind being in control seems iffy.
Look inside and see if you can find this controller. Is it the thinker of your thoughts? Where is this thinker? Can you find him or her? Is it the soul? While some of my readers are very convinced of the reality of the soul, I would ask you to do a very simple thing: look inside and find it. I mean, if the soul is you, then shouldn’t you be able to find it? It seems reasonable. And yet, when you look inside, what do you find?
If you are like me (and basically everyone else who does this very simple exercise), you come to the most interesting realization: there is nothing there. You look inside and you find nothing. In this context, you look inside for the controller, for the ultimate you that does things, decides things, chooses things, and you do not find anything. You find a whole lot of nothing.
I will leave you with a few questions: is this a bad thing, finding nothing? What if this nothing that you find is what you are? What if everyone is the same nothing? How much control, then, do you have over your life? Every time you look inside, you can’t find the you that you always thought you were, and instead find nothing. Isn’t that interesting?
In my next post, for those of you who are convinced as to the reality of the soul, I’ll take a look at it and discuss why it, too, is not what you are (even if we assume for a moment that it does exist). Namaste.
Written on February 3, 2008 by Tom Stine
Adyashanti is a wonderful spiritual teacher from near San Jose, California. He is “an awakening guy” as he likes to say, and his teacher is focused exclusively on spiritual awakening. For my money, he is the real deal.
The you that you think of as you (and that thinks of you as you, and so on) is not you, it’s just the character that the underlying truth of you is dreaming into brief existence. Enlightenment isn’t in the character, it’s in the underlying truth. Now, there’s nothing wrong with being a dream character, of course, unless it’s your goal to wake up, in which case the dream character must be ruthlessly annihilated. If your desire is to experience transcendental bliss or supreme love or altered states of consciousness or awakened kundalini, or to quality for heaven, or to liberate all sentient beings, or simply to become the best dang person you can be, then rejoice!, you’re in the right place: the dream state, the dualistic universe. However, if your interest is to cut the crap and figure out what’s true, then you’re in the wrong place and you’ve got a very messy fight ahead and there’s no point in pretending otherwise.
But beauty, real beauty, ends where intellectual expression begins. Intellect is in itself a mode of exaggeration, and destroys the harmony of a face. The moment one sits down to think, one becomes all nose, or all forehead, or something horrid. Look at the successful men in any of the learned professions. How perfectly hideous they are! Except, of course, in the Church. But then in the Church they don’t think. A bishop keeps on saying at the age of eighty what he was told to say when he was a boy of eighteen, and as a natural consequence he always looks absolutely delightful.
Intelligent practice always deals with just one thing: the fear at the base of human existence, the fear that I am not. And of course I am not, but the last thing I want to know is that.
Q: Since all is pre-ordained, is our self-realization also pre-ordained? Or are we free there at least?
A: Destiny refers only to name and shape. Since you are neither body nor mind, destiny has no control over you. You are completely free. The cup is conditioned by its shape, material, use and so on. But the space within the cup is free. It happens to be in the cup only when viewed in connection with the cup. Otherwise, it is just space. As long as there is a body, you appear to be embodied. Without the body you are not disembodied — you just are.
So the most important thing to realize is this: Your life has an inner purpose and an outer purpose. Inner purpose concerns Being and is primary. Outer purpose concerns doing and is secondary…. Your inner purpose is to awaken. It is as simple as that. You share that purpose with every other person on the planet – because it is the purpose of humanity. Your inner purpose is an essential part of the purpose of the whole, the universe and its emerging intelligence.
Buddhism stands unique in the history of human thought in denying the existence of a Soul, Self or Atman. According to the teachings of the Buddha, the idea of self is an imaginary, false belief which has no corresponding reality, and it produces harmful thoughts of ‘me’ and ‘mine’, selfish desire, craving, attachment, hatred, ill-will, conceit, pride, egoism, and other defilements, impurities and problems. It is the source of all troubles in the world from personal conflicts to wars between nations. In short, to this false view can be traced all the evil in the world.
