To continue my recent theme about control, let's take a look at the real heart of the issue. In previous posts, I discussed how the idea of being in control is pretty much illusory and how you can't even control what your next thought is going to be. In this little essay, I want to look at the controller, the you that has no control over anything.
From the beginning, the idea of control over one's life, one's thoughts, one's actions, anything and everything, presupposes that there is a someone who is in control. That stands to reason, doesn't it? If there is control, there must be a controller.
So, find him or her. Right now, see if you can find the controller, the one who has control over this thing called "your life." Is it your body? Does it have control over your life? Is it your mind? Does it have control over your life? Do its wishes, desires, thoughts and even intentions have control? Given that thoughts have a crazy way of "just arising spontaneously" then the mind being in control seems iffy.
Look inside and see if you can find this controller. Is it the thinker of your thoughts? Where is this thinker? Can you find him or her? Is it the soul? While some of my readers are very convinced of the reality of the soul, I would ask you to do a very simple thing: look inside and find it. I mean, if the soul is you, then shouldn't you be able to find it? It seems reasonable. And yet, when you look inside, what do you find?
If you are like me (and basically everyone else who does this very simple exercise), you come to the most interesting realization: there is nothing there. You look inside and you find nothing. In this context, you look inside for the controller, for the ultimate you that does things, decides things, chooses things, and you do not find anything. You find a whole lot of nothing.
I will leave you with a few questions: is this a bad thing, finding nothing? What if this nothing that you find is what you are? What if everyone is the same nothing? How much control, then, do you have over your life? Every time you look inside, you can't find the you that you always thought you were, and instead find nothing. Isn't that interesting?
In my next post, for those of you who are convinced as to the reality of the soul, I'll take a look at it and discuss why it, too, is not what you are (even if we assume for a moment that it does exist). Namaste.